Dealing With Infidelity: What NOT to do
By Ruth Houston
Most women react blindly when they first discover that out their husbands are having an affair and end up doing things they later regret. This article looks at 5 things you shouldn’t do and examines the reasons why.
This may be the most important article you’ll read about dealing with your husband’s affair. There’s plenty of information available on what to do if your husband is cheating. But very little has been written about the things you shouldn’t do during those first few hours or days.
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You’ve just discovered that your husband is cheating. You’re not sure what to do. Before wrestling with that decision, let’s focus first on what you shouldn’t do. Most women react blindly when they find out their husbands are having an affair. They let fear, anger, hurt, or a desire for revenge compel them to do things they later regret; things which make it difficult or impossible to implement any worthwhile infidelity advice they may later receive.
This article will keep you from making a mistake that could sabotage the course of action you eventually decide to take. Regardless of whether you decide to leave your husband or stay with him and try to work things out, doing the wrong thing at the outset can make a bad situation worse. Let’s look at 5 key things you SHOULDN’T do and examine the reasons why.
1. Don’t put him out or leave him – yet.
Instead of your first move, putting your husband out or leaving him should be your last resort. You may eventually decide to do this, but for now, it’s the worst thing you can do. Right now you need to keep a close eye on what’s going on. It’ll be easier to do that if the two of you are still living under the same roof. If you put him out or leave, you’ll be hard-pressed to know what he’s doing, short of hiring an investigator. As long as you’re still together, you can keep your finger on the pulse of his affair and gather some much-needed facts. There’s a lot you need to know about the situation before you can make an intelligent decision about what to do. Continue monitoring your husband’s activities, attitude, the frequency of his contact with his lover and any other details concerning his affair. Write everything down in a journal for future use. Also bear in mind that as long as he’s still there, you have a chance to work things out.
In dealing with infidelity, there are different course of action that can be taken. but most people forget that the most important thing is knowing what NOT to do when you discover his affair, especially the very next hour after the bomb is dropped.
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