Archive for December, 2010

Is your personal baggage stuffing up your marriage?

Tuesday, December 21st, 2010

Is your personal baggage stuffing up your marriage?

by Beth McHugh | More from this Blogger

baggageSeparation and divorce are at an all time high, and the divorce rate of second and subsequent marriages is of even more concern than those of first marriages. While these statistics are alarming, it is the human suffering that lies behind these figures that is the greatest tragedy.

Are our marriages really less happy than those of our grandparents, who if they lived long enough, went on to celebrate 50, even 60 years of marriage? If they had access to the easier divorce laws that we currently enjoy, would many of these older unions have broken down as well?

To read on please click here

How To Fight Fair in Your Marriage – - Conflict Management in Marriage

Sunday, December 19th, 2010

How To Fight Fair in Your Marriage – - Conflict Management in Marriage

By , About.com Guide

Photo: Stockbyte / Getty ImagesPhoto: Stockbyte / Getty Images
All married couples have arguments, or rather fights. How you fight is the key to whether or not you will have a successful, long term marriage.Fighting fairly with respect for one another is a critical marital skill that you must learn.

The way you fight can often tell psychologists more than what you fight about.

If done correctly, conflict and healthy, fair fighting, can strengthen your marriage.

To read on please click here

37 Rules to Fighting Fair

Sunday, December 19th, 2010

37 Rules to Fighting Fair

Posted on August 1, 2008 by Happy Lists

Thousands of people have written about fighting fair.  Here’s a compilation of some fair fighting rules.  Resources are available at the bottom.  All partners and couples engage in conflict, but the key is resolving conflict without being destructive.

Here are some Do’s and Don’ts to Fighting Fair.  I suggest copying and pasting it to a word document, then add and substract to tailor it to you, and print off a couple copies (one for you, and one for your partner).  When you start really getting into it, both of you should have these near you to remind yourself of how to fight FAIR!

DO:

1. Deal with the Here and Now. What is the specific problem right now?  Anything older than 24 hours is garbage, so no garbage-dumping!

2. Take responsibility. Use “I” statements as a way to show you are taking responsibility for your own feelings and actions.

3. Be direct and honest about your feelings and what you want.

To read on please click here

Marriage Communication Issues-A Common Cause of Divorce

Saturday, December 18th, 2010

Marriage Communication Issues-A Common Cause of Divorce

By dllhubpages

Breakdown in communication is one of the most common causes of divorce in marriage. In order for any relationship, especially a marriage, to be successful effective communication is necessary.

A marriage where communication is suffering is very much like being a visitor to country where you don’t speak the language. There may a lot of talking going on, but you don’t understand most of the words. Let’s look at one of the major communication issues many married couples have.

Talking But Not Listening

Most of us have tried to have conversations with people who never shut up. They talk and talk, and when you try to add something to the conversation, they cut you off before you barely get your mouth open.

End Your Divorce

Saturday, December 18th, 2010

Problems in Marriage

Three Reasons for Problems in Marriage

There are many reasons for problems in marriage.  There are minor problems and major problems that can occur in marriages.  Sometimes problems seem to pop up all at once and in other situations problems build and build until they cause a marriage to end.  Getting to the heart of the problems is important to fixing them, but actually determining the problems in marriage is the first thing you have to do.  Until you can actually pinpoint what is wrong, you can’t fix a thing.

There are actually three main problems that occur in a marriage that lead to terrible issues within a marriage.  These three problems include: not handling arguments correctly, ineffective communication and a lack of trust.

Not Handling Arguments Correctly
Every marriage has its fair share of fights and arguments.  Not every marriage fails because of them, though.  Knowing how to argue correctly is essential in a marriage.  It is very important that any arguments are handled quickly and that they are completely resolved.  Too often, married couples only settle a fight.  They fail to actually solve it.  What happens is that bad feelings or issues linger and end up even worse than the original argument, causing problems in marriage.

All arguments should be resolved when they happen.  Nobody should just walk away and you should not let it linger for days before talking about it.  It is very important that you approach problems in marriage like adults.  Sit down, talk it out and come to a good resolution.

To read on please click here

How To Stop Yourself Getting Angry At Your Spouse

Saturday, December 18th, 2010

Communication is so important.

How To Stop Yourself Getting Angry At Your Spouse

The Key to Successful Relationships

Friday, December 17th, 2010

The Key to Successful Relationships

By Louise Baker, guest Blogger

Psychologist and relationship expert Dr. John Gottman warns that couples should have 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction to help maintain a happy relationship. Happiness is not only good to individual health, but it also strengthens bonds between couples. When couples have positive, fun interactions their bodies release endorphins. Endorphins are chemicals in the body that pass a message along to the brain. When a person is happy the endorphins are communicating with opioid receptors that release a euphoric feeling throughout the body.

Couples that meet the recommended positive interaction ratio report being happier with their relationship and have more fulfilling, long lasting relationships than couples that have less positive interactions. Having fun in a relationship is the key to success.

Why Date Night is Important

Whether in a newly formed relationship or in a relationship that has lasted decades, date night is important to maintaining a successful, happy relationship. Date nights allow couples to set aside specific time for each other. This shows that the relationship is meaningful and worthy of specific, devoted attention. Date night can also allow couples to step away from the monotony of everyday life and experience something new and adventurous.

Date Night Recommendations

Physical Activities Hiking, biking, skating, or going to the gym with a significant other are great ways to strengthen a positive relationship. Physical exercise allows a person to release endorphins more quickly and will create a lasting bond between couples.

Sensory Activities Appealing to the senses is another great way to release endorphins. Activities such as wine tasting, a romantic dinner, going to a concert, visiting a museum or botanical garden are excellent ways to heighten the senses. If a couple feels like staying in, they might try a candle lit dinner or edible body paint to elicit a very sensual, intimate interaction.

Adventurous Activities Similar to physical activities, adventurous activities naturally put the body in a heighten state of awareness thus, releasing endorphins. When a person engages in adventurous activities with a partner the body associates the euphoric feeling with that person, thus strengthening their positive bond. Adventurous Activities might include, indoor rock climbing, geo-caching, or going to a sporting event.

Everyday Happiness

Although date night is a great way to bond, positive interactions don’t need to be saved for a specific time. Simple, everyday kind gestures can also elicit positive endorphins. Activities such as making dinner together, renting a favorite movie, going on a walk together, or just a simple complement can be enjoyable, fun experiences for both partners.

Louise Baker is a freelance blogger who usually writes about accredited online colleges for Zen College Life. Her most recent article ranked engineering degrees.

Having Fun Sex at Every Age

Friday, December 17th, 2010

Having Fun Sex at Every Age

Enjoying a healthy, fun sex life is possible no matter how old you are. If medical conditions or simply being in a rut has dampened your desire, consider these sex tips to revitalize romance.

Having satisfying, fun, and healthy sex should be part of your life at every age, even as you get older. But sometimes age-related physical changes or sex that has become routine can lead to dissatisfaction in the bedroom.

If your sex life has deteriorated or if you feel that you and your partner are in a sexual rut, there are sex tips that can spice up your relationship and help you enjoy fun sex again.

Healthy Sex and Aging: Why the Spark Sometimes Fades

In a recent survey conducted by the AARP, researchers found that almost half of men and women 45 years of age and older report being less satisfied in their sex life than they were a decade earlier.

There are many reasons researchers believe sexual desire and function tends to decline over the years, including:

  • Menopause. As a woman’s hormonal levels fluctuate around the time of menopause, the vagina becomes shorter and narrows, the vaginal walls stiffen, and there is often a reduced amount of vaginal lubrication. These changes can make sex uncomfortable or even painful for both the woman and her partner.
  • Erectile dysfunction. The inability to produce or maintain an erection becomes more common with advancing age.
  • Pain and discomfort. Certain age-related health problems, including arthritis and chronic pain, can make having sex uncomfortable and interfere with your ability to have a fun sex life.
  • Other health conditions. Your chances of developing diabetes, heart disease, stroke, and dementia increase with age, and men and women with these conditions often have difficulty maintaining a healthy sex life.
  • Medications. Certain medications, including blood pressure medications, antidepressants, and antihistamines, have been associated with erectile dysfunction in men or lack of sexual desire in women.
  • Emotional issues. As you age and your body changes, you may become insecure about your appearance, which can get in the way of your enjoying a fun sex life. You may also have to face difficult issues, such as illness, which can put sex on the back burner of your relationship.

Putting the Fun Back Into Your Sex Life

There’s more content below this advertisement. Jump to the content.

If you are looking for ways to maintain a healthy sex life or put the spark back into your intimate relationship, consider the following sex tips:

  • Get creative. Trying different approaches when it comes to sex is one of the best ways to spice up your sex life. In the AARP sex survey, only 29 percent of respondents described their partner as being imaginative when it came to sex. So if there is a sex toy you have always been curious about or a new position that you want to try, consider introducing it into your next sexual encounter.
  • Be more adventurous. Any change from your regular sexual routine can put the excitement back into your sex life. If you always have sex in the evening, try having sex in the morning. If sex usually happens in the bedroom, try a new location.
  • Fantasize with your partner. It can be difficult to talk with your partner about sexual issues. But instead of focusing on your dissatisfaction in the bedroom, try opening up about your sexual fantasies and ask your partner to share sex fantasies with you. Talking about your innermost desires can be a great form of foreplay.
  • Take the lead. If your partner is always the one to initiate sex, try initiating it yourself. Changing up who takes the lead in the bedroom can be a great way to get excited about sex again.
  • Rediscover foreplay. People in longstanding relationships tend to skimp on foreplay, but if you are having problems getting aroused, spending more time caressing can help you get fully in the mood for sex and enjoy it more.

If you are having problems with arousal or sexual function that are interfering with your ability to enjoy sex, talk with your doctor. Often, simple treatments are available to help you have an active and healthy sex life again.

Learn more in the Everyday Health Sexual Health Center.

This Kills Twice as Many People as AIDS – Why are Doctors Ignoring it?

Friday, December 17th, 2010

This Kills Twice as Many People as AIDS – Why are Doctors Ignoring it?

Posted By Dr. Mercola | December 17 2010 | 67,663 views
About $282 million was paid to doctors by drug companies last year. Is this compromising the best interests of their patients?

Dr. Mercola’s Comments:

Many people are still completely unaware of the many ways in which they are being manipulated into taking dangerous and unnecessary drugs.

There’s the $5 billion direct-to-consumer marketing, of course, which is rather obvious. But physicians also play a major role, and the manipulation that takes place on this level is more obscure.

Drug reps often give ‘gifts’ to convince doctors to prescribe the medications that they represent. These drug reps usually have no medical or science education. Instead, they’re armed with some of the most potent brainwashing techniques used throughout the world, which I’ll discuss in a moment.

Perhaps the manipulation technique most difficult to detect is the ‘education’ given by doctors, to doctors.

Here, it’s very easy to forget that the doctor presenting the material is working entirely on the drug company’s behalf, and not as an independent, well-educated, appropriate source of objective information.

And then there’s the insidious Drug Industry sponsored “education” that takes place in medical schools across the US.

For example, out of Harvard’s 8,900 professors and lecturers, 1,600 admit that they or a family member have ties to drug companies that could bias their teaching or research. In 2008 alone the pharmaceutical industry contributed more than $11.5 million to Harvard for “research and continuing education classes.”

All of these tactics (and others) are employed on a massive scale in the name of “education,” but nothing could be further from the truth.

Is Your Doctor Paid to Promote a Drug?

Chances are your doctor has fallen prey to pharmaceutical marketing tactics. Most doctors simply do not have the time to research each drug, and rely heavily on information from their pharmaceutical reps and from other ‘experts,’ i.e. doctors who are receiving significant fees to talk about drug treatments.

Pharmaceutical sales reached a staggering $300 BILLION last year, up five percent from 2008. It’s no secret that the industry spends big bucks on direct-to-consumer advertising, but just how much do they spend on marketing to doctors?

A LOT!

According to a new database created by ProPublica, seven drug companies paid $282 million to more than 17,000 doctors during 2009-2010.

The drug companies included in the database are:

  1. Cephalon
  2. Johnson&Johnson
  3. Merck
  4. Pfizer
  5. GlaxoSmithKline
  6. AstraZeneca
  7. Eli Lilly

Bear in mind that these seven represent just a small portion of the drug industry as a whole!

In 2006, the pharmaceutical industry spent an estimated $16 BILLION on physician advertising. At the time, that amounted to $10,000 for every doctor in the US.

How Does Drug Industry “Education” Help Protect and Improve Your Health?

The drug industry insists these payments are for “education,” and improve patient care by keeping doctors up-to-date. However, I agree with those who call it bribery as it most definitely influences doctors’ prescribing habits, which can have a seriously detrimental impact on their patients’ health.

After all, prescription drugs are responsible for an estimated 700,000 ER visits a year due to adverse drug reactions. And adverse drug reactions from drugs that are properly prescribed and properly administered cause about 106,000 deaths per year, making prescription drugs the fourth-leading cause of death in the U.S.

The truth is prescription drugs kill more than twice as many Americans as HIV/AIDS or suicide. Fewer die from accidents or diabetes than adverse drug reactions.

In light of those statistics, if all this money is spent to educate and improve patient care, how well is that working, you think?

These payments are entirely legal, and drug companies are not even required to disclose who they pay or how much. According to ProPublica, all but two of the seven companies included in their database were forced to divulge this information as part of settlements and lawsuits.

This will all change in 2013 under the new health care law, however.

Just How Much are Doctors Paid to Promote Drugs?

As discussed in the CNN video above, payments received by individual doctors ranged from $100 to $300,000 since 2009.

  • 384 doctors received payments greater than $100,000, of which
  • 43 doctors received more than $200,000 each

As mentioned earlier, these numbers represent payments from just seven drug companies!

The industry claims it’s worth every penny, which only proves that these tactics most definitely increase drug sales, by influencing physicians to change their prescription habits.

But exactly how do they do it?

What makes otherwise well educated, intelligent doctors turn their backs on their Hippocratic Oath (to do no harm) and do the complete opposite by prescribing unnecessary and potentially dangerous drugs?

Potent Brainwashing Techniques Applied

Unbeknown to many doctors, drug companies use some of the most potent brainwashing techniques in the world, including extensive detailing of their personality in order for each encounter to be specifically tailored for maximum effect.

Even those who suspect they may be subject to some manipulation are mostly unaware of just how extensive and detailed the drug companies’ profiling of them is.

Not only are reps trained to assess their personality, practice style, and medical preferences, they’re also instructed to sniff out personal information, like the names of family members, birthdays, and family interests — as well as the physician’s professional interests and recreational pursuits.

All of this information goes into a database for future reference. When the time comes to devise an “incentive” — say a dinner, sporting event, or membership — it is custom tailored to suit the prey. It’s all about establishing personal rapport. Oftentimes doctors mistake the reps’ cleverly disguised interest in them as personal friendship.

This is exactly how it’s designed to work!

The database also reveals how many of a doctor’s patients receive specific drugs, how many competing drugs are prescribed compared with the target drug, and how the physician’s prescribing habits change over time.

It tells them if a drug is “in favor” with a particular doctor or not, and gives them the tools to cook up a winning strategy for future manipulations.

Truly, the idea that pharmaceutical reps provide some kind of valuable, informative service to physicians is total fiction, created and perpetuated by the drug industry, to keep this deadly, but profitable, scheme going.

Unwieldy Doctors Get the Big Hammer…

Any doctor who has the good sense and integrity to question the information they receive and do their own homework can easily end up on the drug industry’s Blacklist.

For example, last year it was discovered that drug giant Merck had a hit list of doctors to be “neutralized” or discredited because they were speaking out against the painkiller Vioxx.

It just goes to show that when persuasion tactics don’t work, the drug cartel will not hesitate to ramp up the ante against dissenting doctors.

Time to Lift the Veil…

It’s quite clear that both doctors and the public at large are being manipulated for the sake of corporate profits. The pharmaceutical industry is not really about promoting health, but making money off disease. And when one market begins to dwindle, they simply create a new one, by inventing yet another disease. Usually by “upgrading” a common symptom into disease status…

But you don’t have to fall victim to these tactics. All that is needed is to see them for what they are: manipulative marketing strategies.

Folks, you CAN Take Control of Your Health. You don’t have to put up with this kind of insanity any longer. By educating yourself on the tactics employed, you can learn to see right through the propaganda, and stop being deceived by drug company lies and deceptions.

Then, tell your family, friends and neighbors, and be a source of true education.

Collectively we can stop this unwise and foolish expenditure of resources on treatments that do not work, or worse, are completely unnecessary and cause further harm. It is a massive David vs. Goliath battle, but there is no doubt in my mind that the victory will eventually be ours.

How to Survive in a Disease-Promoting Paradigm

Remember, there are a number of basic strategies you can use to avoid getting sucked into the current disease-care paradigm. Here’s a summary of my top 10 Healthful Lifestyle Strategies:

  1. Eat a healthy diet that’s right for your nutritional type (paying very careful attention to keeping your insulin levels down)
  2. Drink plenty of clean water
  3. Manage your stress
  4. Exercise regularly
  5. Experience healthy doses of sunlight
  6. Limit toxin exposure
  7. Consume healthy fat
  8. Eat plenty of raw food
  9. Optimize insulin and leptin levels
  10. Get plenty of sleep

Medication Madness Book Review

Thursday, December 16th, 2010

Medication Madness Book Review by Dr. John Breeding

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